Wyszdom

After Beah generously provided me with authentic Beah Burger garments, I decided I would go through with my original plan to be a Beah for Halloween. She hooked me up with the good stuff: leggings, a skirt, a white t-shirt, and her trademark red sweatshirt.

That left me with just a few items to provide myself: glasses (optional), footwear (flip-flops will do), and a wig.

I heard from Koklynn that finding a wig would likely be difficult so close to the holiday, even at a seasonal costume store. But, on Halloween Eve she texted me with good news. She was in Walmart, and was able to grab one of the last wigs as they were flying off the shelves. The only problem was that the only remaining wig was blonde, and Beah is not:

I figured this wouldn’t be a big deal; I could just dye it. Girls are changing their hair color all the time. Unfortunately, the only spray-on hair dyes they had were weird colors like green, so I decided to go with a more intense coloring solution. Koklynn told me it probably wouldn’t work, since it isn’t real hair, but I still went ahead and picked up some product:

I also found some cheap red glasses, which aren’t exactly the same style as Beah’s, but close enough. I popped out the lenses though because they were making me dizzy.

The hair coloring instructions were more complicated than I expected, but I dove right in and started coloring the wig. It was a pretty messy process, but I contained as much as I could to my bathroom sink and I was wearing the provided gloves. Unfortunately, during the process I learned a couple of things:
1) This stuff gets airborne (and on everything in the bathroom) very easily.
2) I need to get a new comb.

The wig was a little too long in the back to match Beah’s hair, so while I was coloring I also decided to cut it to a more accurate shape. To make sure I got this right, I put the wig on and cut in front of the mirror. I also thought it would be easier to color this way. Turns out it was a great way to color my face:

Not only did it color my face, I also noticed at one point that I must have poked holes in my gloves, because both of my hands became stained. They’re still dyed, even after a shower and several hand-washings:

After about an hour of careful application through every layer of fake hair, I finally had the entire wig colored, and it actually looked pretty good. I was amazed at how much I was able to change the color, and when wet the wig’s style really came close to matching the real thing. Here’s the color I was able to get, with an uncolored lock in the foreground for comparison:

Satisfied and extremely proud of myself, I started to think about what it would be like at work. I even imagined a scenario where I would get there really early and sit at Beah’s desk, and see if arriving coworkers thought I was her until I turned around. To make sure the color really set in, I let the wig sit for an hour.

After an hour, the last thing I needed to to was rinse out the excess coloring agent. As soon as that warm water hit the wig, I knew I was in for an EPIC FAIL. Here’s what I soon saw… a wet blonde wig:

If I wasn’t wearing Beah’s clothes, I’d probably just re-color the wig and not rinse it, and risk staining an old sweatshirt. But I couldn’t pass on a chance to wear the real deal.

By this time it was too late for me to find another solution, so I had to settle for “Beah Burger wearing a blonde wig” as my costume. I dried the wig on my heater (I don’t have a hairdryer), put on Beah’s clothes, and became this:

Unfortunately, if you just look at my face, I look like Liam Sullivan’s “Kelly” character:

Happy Halloween.

Every four years there are a bunch of campaigns encouraging people to exercise their right to vote. This is good and important, but they often use this line: “It doesn’t matter who you vote for.”

Now I know what they’re trying to say. They’re trying to say:
I’m not using this message to ask you to vote for a particular candidate, but I think that you should carefully consider your options and weigh in with your opinion. Together, we’ll make the right choice for all of us.

But here’s what it sounds like:
It doesn’t matter who you vote for. The journey is more important than the destination. Just go in, flip a coin, get your sticker, and feel good about yourself.

I was reading an article in New Scientist about the “dead water” effect, and got annoyed by one of the headings. Check out the paragraph under “Swimming hazard?” and look for any mention of swimming. There is none. It’s all about boats in cold ocean water.

Halloween is coming up and I don’t know what I’m going to be. This isn’t a big deal for most adults, but at Google you stand out if you don’t wear a costume. Last year, I was Cheese Wysz. In 2006, I was a play on words.

I have a few ideas but I’m still open to suggestions. I’d prefer costumes that require little cost or effort. As a kid there was a brief phase where I insisted on being something scary (I didn’t see how dressing up as a non-scary character fit into the idea of Halloween), but I’m past that now and prefer humor over horror. It can be obscure and I’m fine if even I don’t get the reference.

My ideas so far:

• Beah Burger
  I’d be the “I think I’m in an ’80s sitcom” version of Beah, wearing tights under a skirt, a sweatshirt, a wig, and Beah Burger glasses.
   
• Sophia Lin
  Dressed like a prisoner.
   
• Halloween Costume
  Something simple like a white sheet (ghost), but with a hanger and price tag attached.

Please comment on my current ideas or suggest something new in the comments. If you want to keep it a secret, you can email me. If you’re shy, use my advice form to give me advice.

And if you’re a girl and looking for an idea, Tiffany has given up on her part-time model idea, so go ahead and steal that.

I was nostalgic today and remembered being excited about, but then always terrified by, haunted hayrides. There was always a guy with a chainsaw. A couple of times we went to the one that was at least at some point associated with Bucks County River Country. I think the attraction I’m thinking of is most recently known as Valley of Fear, which according to at least one account has the largest haunted woods in the nation.

While Valley of Fear may own the likely very valuable hauntedhayride.com, Bucks County River Country takes the cake for best website ever. Go to the DSL or Cable version and enjoy a loosely edited video for the holiday season that makes Bucks County look like Hicktown, USA, in the most friendly and charming way, of course. At the end they transition into a slideshow of Don Polec enjoying the river in a button-down shirt. I used to see him waiting for pizza on Friday nights.

P.S. Speaking of the holidays, I was in a hardware store this weekend and the were selling those light-up snowmen in a place where it doesn’t snow. Kinda funny that an entire season is associated with a holiday even in a place where it doesn’t exist.

After months in development, Mike has finally officially launched his latest site: Student Pwned. My one humble contribution was an addition to the FAQ back in August. I’m glad he remembered to include it.

Michael Wyszomierski: why is it a thermometer if it’s a water theme?
Michael Wyszomierski: can’t you have rising water or something?
Mike Leotta: because thats what all fund raiser things do
Michael Wyszomierski: haha
Michael Wyszomierski: this is true
Michael Wyszomierski: you should note that in your faq
Michael Wyszomierski:
Q: Why a thermometer?
A: Because that’s what all fundraiser things do.
Mike Leotta: hahah
Michael Wyszomierski: i like the logo though
Michael Wyszomierski: looks like the title screen of a flash game

I wrote about my frustrations with Zecco during the signup process, so to be fair I wanted to give a quick update on how things are going now. My account got approved, the wire transfer worked, and I now own stock. It’s really easy. I had to consult other sites for definitions of basic terms (a glossary with links to it throughout the interface would be nice), but the service is very usable, even for a beginner.

I haven’t sold anything yet (I’m looking for long term gains), but after the close today I’m up 5.47%.

Here’s an idea for a short film/video. Feel free to use it (but please leave a comment with a link to your video if you do!)

“A little too much.”

Document some things that can be done just a little too much. You can fill up a glass of water just a little too much, and it spills. You can pull your car forward just a little too much. You can tighten things a little too much. You can hug someone or shake hands a little too long. You can put on a little too much makeup. It can be non-physical as well. You can go a little too far with a joke. Your film can be a little too long.

Try and build up tension with each segment as the audience knows the breaking point is coming. Have a little too much fun.

There are lots of ridiculous anecdotes about the airline industry. Here’s another one.

My family flew to Italy to visit my sister. At some point in the process, actual paper tickets and boarding passes were mailed to them. They brought the boarding passes on the journey, but were told at the airport and on the plane that they needed “flight coupons” that were sent as well. The actual pieces of paper. The fact that they had ID, confirmation numbers, credit cards, etc. associated with the reservation apparently meant nothing. Somehow they made it to Italy, even after being stopped several times by staff requesting the coupons. In order to avoid testing their luck on the way back, they’ve been on a mission to get these paper coupons from the airline. A trip to the airport and even an expensive 6-hour round trip to Rome were unsuccessful. They ended up having to cancel the existing reservation (made months ago) and create a new one, which of course costs significantly more being at the last minute, and they don’t get the refund for the cancelled reservations for six months.

Honestly, how can you tell someone with a serious face that they need a piece of paper to get something done these days? I realize that this may be a complicated situation (credit card company and multiple affiliated airlines involved), but if you’re going to offer something to your customers, it should work.

Titled as promised.

Here’s the current status of my attempt to enter the stock market as a first-time, poorly-informed trader during what people are saying is the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression. (I like to do silly things.)

This morning, both my Zecco and TradeKing accounts were approved. Now I have three approved trading accounts from E*TRADE, Zecco, and TradeKing.

E*TRADE
My E*TRADE account is funded, but I cannot invest until Wednesday because for reasons that may not be E*TRADE’s fault, they delay funds transferred using the method I used. So now my money is sitting there (it’s already gone from my checking account) and I can’t get it out for a few more days. Hopefully closing the account and getting my money won’t be a tough process.

Zecco
I was about to fund Zecco the same way when I read that while not the easiest way to fund the account, using a wire transfer was the fastest. Considering all of the delays I’ve had to deal with so far, and the fact that I never really planned on investing much of my time in this process, I decided to try the wire transfer. What’s funny about a wire transfer is that the process, which is electronic by its name, requires one to actually visit a physical bank branch. So I did, and filled out the form as best I could using the information given to me by Zecco. Half of the form was a series of questions asking me if I had fallen for an advance-fee scam. Hopefully I got enough of it right that my money will get to the right place, and I can get going at this on Monday. After the many delays in getting started, it looks like I have to reevaluate my initial stock picks thanks to recent news. Great.

TradeKing
My TradeKing account will probably just be cancelled assuming Zecco goes well on Monday when the money is transferred. I only signed up for it after I feared that my Zecco approval would never happen, and they have good reviews for customer service.

I’m just not used to inefficient dinosaur industries like banking. You’d think that the Internet would make all of this dead simple, but it doesn’t work that way. I still can’t get over the fact that I can’t do what I want with my money (beyond limited ATM withdrawals) outside of banker’s hours. And why does it take so long for stuff to be approved? And why do I have to go to a branch to make something happen faster? And why is it so confusing? What a broken system.

Anyway, I need to get back to filling out and then dropping off my ballot. I’m not mailing it because that requires something like 59¢ of postage, and I don’t see any 59¢ stamps. That’s another confusing business, but I must say I’m amazed how reliable it is.

I signed up for an account on Tuesday.

On Wednesday, I still had not received any confirmation that my application for a trading account had been received. In fact, if I signed in to my “regular” account (yeah, confusing), it encouraged me to sign up for a trading account. So, I emailed customer service asking if my application had been received. On Wednesday afternoon, I received an automated message confirming the application, and indicating that I would be contacted when it was approved.

This morning (Thursday), I got a reply to my email to customer service. They said that the application was approved and all I had to do was click on “Trading” and enter my trading key. If I click on “Trading” while signed in, it still asks me to apply for an account. There is no option to enter a trading key.

I tried calling customer service to get this sorted out. After about 30 minutes on hold during lunch, I got to talk to someone. The rep was actually pretty helpful, but I shouldn’t have had to call in the first place.

What had happened was I had misunderstood a question on the application, and answered it in a way that would require a specific letter to be sent to Zecco. The problem is, they never told me this until I called. If I hadn’t called, my account would probably have been left in this state forever. I ended up having to send them a fax (yes, apparently that technology still exists) explaining my error. Hopefully they’ll get this sorted out soon.

So far it’s E*TRADE: 0, Zecco: 0.