My family flew to Italy to visit my sister. At some point in the process, actual paper tickets and boarding passes were mailed to them. They brought the boarding passes on the journey, but were told at the airport and on the plane that they needed “flight coupons” that were sent as well. The actual pieces of paper. The fact that they had ID, confirmation numbers, credit cards, etc. associated with the reservation apparently meant nothing. Somehow they made it to Italy, even after being stopped several times by staff requesting the coupons. In order to avoid testing their luck on the way back, they’ve been on a mission to get these paper coupons from the airline. A trip to the airport and even an expensive 6-hour round trip to Rome were unsuccessful. They ended up having to cancel the existing reservation (made months ago) and create a new one, which of course costs significantly more being at the last minute, and they don’t get the refund for the cancelled reservations for six months.

Honestly, how can you tell someone with a serious face that they need a piece of paper to get something done these days? I realize that this may be a complicated situation (credit card company and multiple affiliated airlines involved), but if you’re going to offer something to your customers, it should work.

Here’s the current status of my attempt to enter the stock market as a first-time, poorly-informed trader during what people are saying is the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression. (I like to do silly things.)

This morning, both my Zecco and TradeKing accounts were approved. Now I have three approved trading accounts from E*TRADE, Zecco, and TradeKing.

E*TRADE
My E*TRADE account is funded, but I cannot invest until Wednesday because for reasons that may not be E*TRADE’s fault, they delay funds transferred using the method I used. So now my money is sitting there (it’s already gone from my checking account) and I can’t get it out for a few more days. Hopefully closing the account and getting my money won’t be a tough process.

Zecco
I was about to fund Zecco the same way when I read that while not the easiest way to fund the account, using a wire transfer was the fastest. Considering all of the delays I’ve had to deal with so far, and the fact that I never really planned on investing much of my time in this process, I decided to try the wire transfer. What’s funny about a wire transfer is that the process, which is electronic by its name, requires one to actually visit a physical bank branch. So I did, and filled out the form as best I could using the information given to me by Zecco. Half of the form was a series of questions asking me if I had fallen for an advance-fee scam. Hopefully I got enough of it right that my money will get to the right place, and I can get going at this on Monday. After the many delays in getting started, it looks like I have to reevaluate my initial stock picks thanks to recent news. Great.

TradeKing
My TradeKing account will probably just be cancelled assuming Zecco goes well on Monday when the money is transferred. I only signed up for it after I feared that my Zecco approval would never happen, and they have good reviews for customer service.

I’m just not used to inefficient dinosaur industries like banking. You’d think that the Internet would make all of this dead simple, but it doesn’t work that way. I still can’t get over the fact that I can’t do what I want with my money (beyond limited ATM withdrawals) outside of banker’s hours. And why does it take so long for stuff to be approved? And why do I have to go to a branch to make something happen faster? And why is it so confusing? What a broken system.

Anyway, I need to get back to filling out and then dropping off my ballot. I’m not mailing it because that requires something like 59¢ of postage, and I don’t see any 59¢ stamps. That’s another confusing business, but I must say I’m amazed how reliable it is.

On Wednesday, I still had not received any confirmation that my application for a trading account had been received. In fact, if I signed in to my “regular” account (yeah, confusing), it encouraged me to sign up for a trading account. So, I emailed customer service asking if my application had been received. On Wednesday afternoon, I received an automated message confirming the application, and indicating that I would be contacted when it was approved.

This morning (Thursday), I got a reply to my email to customer service. They said that the application was approved and all I had to do was click on “Trading” and enter my trading key. If I click on “Trading” while signed in, it still asks me to apply for an account. There is no option to enter a trading key.

I tried calling customer service to get this sorted out. After about 30 minutes on hold during lunch, I got to talk to someone. The rep was actually pretty helpful, but I shouldn’t have had to call in the first place.

What had happened was I had misunderstood a question on the application, and answered it in a way that would require a specific letter to be sent to Zecco. The problem is, they never told me this until I called. If I hadn’t called, my account would probably have been left in this state forever. I ended up having to send them a fax (yes, apparently that technology still exists) explaining my error. Hopefully they’ll get this sorted out soon.

So far it’s E*TRADE: 0, Zecco: 0.

Let’s see how low the prices stay over the next week. Assuming prices are low enough, I’ll reveal my picks after I buy.

Reid Yokoyama
hi wysz
Michael Wyszomierski
hi reid
Reid Yokoyama
how are you?
Michael Wyszomierski
happy to be talking to you
Michael Wyszomierski
how are you
Reid Yokoyama
wow
Reid Yokoyama
good
Reid Yokoyama
just wanted to say hi
Michael Wyszomierski
haha really
Michael Wyszomierski
i really only do well in conversations with a clear business need

I keep the bulk of my savings in no-risk, insured, low-yield accounts. I add a little more to these savings every month. To prevent me from doing anything stupid, I set a threshold (just in my mind; not with any financial device) that the account can never go below. And as the account grows, so does the threshold. As an example, let’s say that the account has $11 at one point, and I set the threshold every $5. At that time, I can never let the account go below $10, but if I really want to, I can take out up to a dollar. If the account goes up to $17 at a later time, I cannot let the account go below $15. I like this system. The most savings I can lose is $5.

The only times I will be able to go below the threshold are when buying a house or a spouse. I wouldn’t even go below it to buy a car at this point. My retirement savings are not included in this discussion, but yes, I’m planning for that too.

For a while, I kept my savings in an online savings account, but recently the interest rate made sense for me to put a chunk of it in a CD. I don’t have to worry about being penalized for taking money out of it, because the amount put in the CD was all protected by my artificial threshold anyway, so it’s nothing I’ll want to touch. I’ve kept some out in my regular savings account in case a better rate comes along before this one-year CD is up.

Now of course not all of my money is savings. So what do I do with the rest of it? Well, first I spend it on monthly payments like rent. I also have miscellaneous non-monthly expenses, like gifts, travel, and car maintenance. But, even after all that, there’s still some left. It’s not always a lot, but I can have fun with it. I can decide to blow it on something that won’t turn into cash, like entertainment or gadgets. Or, I put it into high-risk, yet potentially high-yield investments.

Recently, I decided to go for a couple of high-risk investments.

First, when I was in Vegas to see Blue Man Group, I of course had to “invest” in some slots. They turned out to be high-yield at first, but also high-risk as when I reinvested what I earned, I didn’t get it back. No big deal; I walked out with about the same amount I walked in with. It’s a good thing I used a player’s card; a coin in/out statement is in the mail to help me prove losses for taxes.

With all the crazy financial stuff that’s going on right now, I got inspired by a thought from Mike and decided to throw some extra cash into a more socially acceptable form of gambling. Tonight, I opened up an account on E*TRADE. I was able to fund it instantly from my bank account, but unfortunately these funds won’t be available for investing purposes for four business days. Let’s hope the stock market freaks out just a little longer.

So we’ll see what happens in four days. After about five minutes of research, I know what I would buy tomorrow, but that may change over the next few days. After that, I’ll just let it sit and see if this crisis fixes itself. If it doesn’t, well, I can only lose what I put in, which is extra change anyway.

How’s your Saturday night going? Leave a comment.

Sometimes, however, a surprise is welcome, even if it is an advertisement.

This online store from HEMA seems traditional enough at first glance, but study the design carefully and you’ll see what makes it just a little more lively than a typical product listing.

There are some creative “Get a Mac” ads which break through the boundaries of traditional banner advertising.

And most recently, Nintendo has had fun showing off the fun of Wii with a YouTube channel*.

*Disclaimer